На июнь я предлагал то, что предложила deicu: http://wodehouse.ru/cgi/mwf/topic_show.pl?pid=28498#pid28498
Впрочем, если укорачивать тур...

А на июль... как я понял, нужно выкладывать уже в начале 20-х чисел 6-го месяца... кто?.. кто возьмёт на себя?..

думаю, нет ничего ужасного в том, чтобы приём работ на июньский конкурс закончить до 24.06, достаточный срок для небольшого текста.

лично мне тоже нравится баллада, вот текст, что скажут остальные участники?

THE HAPPY MARRIAGE: A Ballad
by P. G. Wodehouse

[A sensation has been caused in Portland, Oregon, by the arrest of
two ladies and their husbands for highway robbery. Evidence was
brought to show that the ladies used to stand beside their husbands
while the robberies were being committed, and help to rifle the victims.]


When EMERSON K. WASHINGTON met SADIE Q. VAN POTT,
Her numerous attractions bowled him over on the spot:
At first distinctly timid, gaining courage by degrees,
He rushed into her presence, and addressed her, on his knees---

"Oh, Sadie Q., I worship you, and not as other men;
My love had proved a worthy theme for Poet Shakespeare's pen;
My groans and sighs excite surprise, whene'er I pace the street;
I really cannot sleep at all. And, worse, I cannot eat.

"For ham and eggs (Virginia style) I've ceased to care a jot;
No strawberry shortcake tempts me now, nor Boston beans, served hot.
The oyster-stew I wave aside: I cannot touch a clam:
From these remarks you'll judge in what a wretched state I am.

"So do decide to be my bride; oh, heed a lover's prayers;
Admit some sunshine to a lot, which now is dark with cares.
But lest without reflection you are tempted to decline,
I'll picture what will happen should we form the said combine.

"Most husbands treat their wives as dolls, and, sorrowful to state,
Refuse to let them take a hand in things of any weight:
Myself I mean to act upon a widely different plan;
For Lovely Woman's duty lies, I hold, in helping man.

"If you elect to marry me, my angel-bird, you'll be
As partner in my business quite invaluable to me.
And what that business is, without preamble I will tell:
You see in me a footpad. And I'm doing very well.

"Way out in pleasant Oregon my humble trade I ply;
Few highwaymen have got a larger clientele than I;
Think not that these are idle words. With truth my claims agree;
You may have heard of 'Sand Bag Bill'? Exactly. I am he.

" So if my proffered heart and hand you'll but consent to take,
You'll come with me on every expedition that I make;
Together, hand in hand, my love, at night we'll roam about,
Entrap the guileless traveller, and---briefly ---clean him out."

His speech was scarcely finished, when quoth SADIE, "Wal, I vum!
What, marry you, my EMERSON? I calculate! Why, some!
Stray travellers in Oregon will soon be mighty sick;
Ring up the parson on the 'phone, and get it over slick."

The parson put the service through without the least delay;
And EMERSON and SADIE Q. were wed that very day;
Their happiness, I'm glad to say, is wholly free from cares;
I never knew so prosperous a married life as theirs.

For every night, when dinner's o'er, and darkling shadows fall,
They take their knuckle-dusters from the hat-stand in the hall,
And EMERSON says, "SADIE, have you cartridges, my pet?
Your iron, is it clean and bright?" And SADIE says, "You bet."

And then through quiet streets they prowl, through dim-lit squares they roam,
They intercept the passer-by, as he is hurrying home;
And EMERSON'S destructive club upsets him with a crash,
While SADIE'S nimble fingers gather in the needful cash.

So on they go from day to day, as happy as can be,
And in this simple tale, I think, a moral we may see:
The married state can never be completely free from strife,
Unless a man's profession also interests his wife.

А можно предложить на рассмотрение вот это?

Damon and Pythias - A Romance
by P G Wodehouse

Since Earth was first created, Since Time began to fly,
No friends were e'er so mated, So firm as JONES and I.
Since primal Man was fashioned To people ice and stones,
No pair, I ween, had ever been Such chums as I and JONES.

In fair and foulest weather, Beginning when but boys,
We faced our woes together, We shared each other's joys.
Together, sad or merry, We acted hand in glove,
Until -- 'twas careless, very -- I chanced to fall in love.

The lady's points to touch on, Her name was JULIA WHITE,
Her lineage high, her scutcheon Untarnished; manners, bright;
Complexion, soft and creamy; Her hair, of golden hue;
Her eyes, in aspect, dreamy, In colour, greyish blue.

For her I sighed, I panted; I saw her in my dreams;
I vowed, protested, ranted; I sent her chocolate creams.
Until methought one morning I seemed to hear a voice,
A still, small voice of warning. "Does JONES approve your choice?"

To JONES of my affection I spoke that very night.
If he had no objection, I said I'd wed Miss WHITE.
I asked him for his blessing, But, turning rather blue,
He said: "It's most distressing, But I adore her, too."

"Then, JONES," I answered, sobbing, "My wooing's at an end,
I couldn't think of robbing My best, my only friend.
The notion makes me furious -- I'd much prefer to die."
"Perhaps you'll think it curious," Said JONES, "but so should I."

Nor he nor I would falter In our resolve one jot.
I bade him seek the altar, He vowed that he would not.
"She's yours, old fellow. Make her As happy as you can."
"Not so," said I, "you take her - You are the lucky man."

At length -- the situation Had lasted now a year -
I had an inspiration, Which seemed to make things clear.
"Supposing," I suggested, "We ask Miss WHITE to choose?
I should be interested To hear her private views.

"Perhaps she has a preference - I own it sounds absurd -
But I submit, with deference, That she might well be heard.
In clear, commercial diction The case in point we'll state,
Disclose the cause of friction, And leave the rest to Fate."

We did, and on the morrow The postman brought us news.
Miss WHITE expressed her sorrow At having to refuse.
Of all her many reasons This seemed to me the pith:
Six months before (or rather more) She'd married Mr. SMITH.

Ema:

> Здравствуйте! Скажите пожалуйста, что же все-таки будет на июнь.

http://wodehouse.ru/cgi/mwf/topic_show.pl?pid=28498#pid28498